everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
