i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
