Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.

(1-813): View more from Florida

Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.

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(410): View more from Maryland

he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero

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(407): View more from Florida

I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.

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(616): View more from Michigan

But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group

(1-303): View more from Colorado

But you wear shame so well

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(469): View more from Texas

I can feel my moral fiber fraying.

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(804): View more from Virginia

In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.

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(858): View more from California

I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight

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