Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize