remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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