you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
