How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
