Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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