It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
