White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
