D3 body, D1 cock
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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