Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
