Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
