I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize