How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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