it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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