At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
