If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
