Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize