Small penises have feelings too.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
