i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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