I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
