Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
