ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize