apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
