just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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