Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
