Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
And then the night went full on bisexual.
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