Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize