so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
