Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
