I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
