Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
