she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Randomize