dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
