After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
