I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
