can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
