Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
he shaved USA in his pubs
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
