If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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