yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
