your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Randomize
