So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I need water and some morals
Randomize
