He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
