well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
