using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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