Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
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