I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Tornado booty call.. dedication
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
