She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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