remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I currently don't understand fingers.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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